Lost as Last Year’s Easter Egg

I shared the behaviors and characteristics regarding my enneagram type 8. “Power” tops the list of characteristics. One of the first behaviors you’ll notice about this type is their power. We tend to believe power is a good thing. Many want it but few don’t understand the extremities of it.

From birth, I have believed that I had to maintain power. I had to maintain it because I didn’t believe anyone around me had it. My shrink often reminds me that I came into this world saying, “Nobody knows what the hell they’re doing.” and I believe that to be true. I believe that I was born into a dysfunctional household and they were lost as last year’s Easter egg.

So I took the bull by the horns and believed that if I don’t do it, it may not get done. I’ve been in power mode my entire life but here’s the other side of what you don’t see. Power is exhausting! When we believe that we are the only ones to do it, we cannot depend on anyone else and we cannot stop or it will fall apart, it causes mental and physical exhaustion.

And exhaustion looks the same on all of us. We cannot function at our best when we are exhausted. We make bad choices and decisions. How many times have we picked the wrong partner, the wrong job, or the wrong house because we are exhausted? We get tired of the search and we throw in the towel and settle.

Being envious of power is never good. If it’s not executed properly it will destroy you and others. I’ll never forget when my shrink told me that I had the power to build an empire and destroy it in a day.

Let’s recognize and be conscious of our power. May we understand that we don’t have to carry the cross alone, others will help and be happy to help us. Notice how tight we hold the pen, the remote, or the broom. Let’s breathe in and out to release that energy behind the force. It’s okay, we can let go and we will survive.