The other day I had a conversation with someone I know very well and they said a few things that sounded like they were searching for compassion, encouragement and they needed reinforcement. Instead of doing those actions, I asked this, “Why are you victim-minded right now?” They got very quiet and then in a strong tone said “I’m not a victim.” Which I replied “Exactly!” If we are not victims then let’s not have a victim mindset.
Did you pay attention to what I said to them? I didn’t give them what they were fishing for with me. I brought their attention to their tone and their words only to snap their attention to what they were doing. I usually don’t do that due to I know people do need compassion, love, and understanding but I felt my energy saying they are not as pathetic as they sound. They are just having a victim mindset and my intuition proved to be right. They said, “I’m not a victim.” And in a snap, it changed the conversation and their mindset.
As my shrink told me when I feel like a victim, feel sorry for myself and need pity. “Here you can have a pity party (as she handed me a box of tissues), you can get a crying towel and you can cry, curl up in a ball and cry your eyes out but just like all parties, people get tired and the party gets old and it’s time to leave the party.” Pity parties work the same way.
If you are feeling like you are a victim to your circumstances then I highly suggest that you curl up in a ball, cry your eyes out, get you a crying towel, kick, scream, roll on the floor and cuss your heart out but when it’s over, get yourself together and stand like a warrior. Stand like you are David looking at Goliath and do not bat an eye at those circumstances in your life. Take all your knowledge and all your strength and tackle that thing that you cried over for hours, days, months. Pray and ask God to give you strength, and wisdom to tackle that thing. Trust me that prayer thing works. I find myself saying and doing things I never thought I had within me but they were there all along. I just had to believe in myself and the God in me to do them. If I can do it, you can too!