I’ve blogged about trauma several times. I believe since my awakening that I’ve become more sensitive to other people’s trauma, not just my own. If you read my story “Trauma in Charleston” then you know I was empathetic to the history of Charleston and the lack of respect and honor as it stands today. Turning slave stables into a tourist attraction is disrespectful to black history and the trauma of each generation.
I’ve also become more aware of religious trauma and how many souls have left the church in droves due to the door being shut instead of open to those hurting. Jesus opened the door to ALL. He welcomed everyone from the whoremonger to healing the “demon-possessed”. He had compassion and empathy. So it doesn’t matter what your church, faith, religion is, if you don’t have those things, you are not doing it right!
And that leads me to one of the worst traumas of them all, grief! Grief is a word that covers so many areas. We grieve when a loved one passes, we grieve over job losses, our children, our parents, our families. One thing we all have in common, grief! So why is it that we do not have empathy when people grieve? I bring this subject up because I had a friend reach out to me and tell me her dad passed. She is on the west coast while her dad is in TN and her stepmother told her about the passing the day before the funeral. Knowing she wouldn’t have time to make the funeral.
I don’t know the whole story and it doesn’t matter, here’s the question. If the tables were turned, how would you feel? And that’s the question we need to start asking ourselves. What if that was me? How would I want to be treated? In my lifetime I’ve witnessed more pain and drama due to people’s lack of empathy when a loved one passes. I’ve seen people challenge wills, steal possessions, disrespect family by not including them in decisions, fight over flowers at the funeral home, and lots more. Just downright ugly!
I can’t wrap my brain around it but it seems to be getting worse. Is that what we’ve become? A society that lacks empathy? We know what grief is and how it feels so why are we dismissing compassion when someone is grieving? Why does one think their grief is worse? Let me say it again. We can not measure emotional pain. We just need to respect it! Everyone suffers from their stuff. Stop comparing. We are not in a contest.
My prayer is we wake up! We’ve got to do better to be better. It’s not hard folks. Do unto others as you’d have them do unto you.