Are you a Confidant, Constituent or Comrade?

Lately, I’ve been thinking about a sermon by Bishop T.D. Jakes that I heard years ago, it has stuck with me since. I felt like I needed to blog about it today due to someone needed to hear it.

He speaks on how our tribe does not always look like us and how we need to be open to a coat of many colors. We need to be aware of the 3 types of people that will come into our lives. I’m quoting his exact words.

Confidants – you’ll have very few of them. Confidants are those people in your life who love you unconditionally. They are into you, whether you’re up or down, right or wrong, they are into you. They are in for the long haul. If you get in trouble, they get in trouble with you. They’ll come see you in the jailhouse. They’ll come get you out the crack house. They’re confidants. You can open up and share anything with them. You’ll never inherit your kingdom until you find your confidant. The confidant will mentor you. If you have 2-3 in your lifetime, you are blessed. Without them, you’ll never be who God called you to be. You need to find your confidant.

Constituents – They are not into you; they are into what you are for. They are for what you are for; they are your constituents. And as long as you are for what they are for, they will walk with you and work with you and labor with you but never think that they are for you. They are for what you are for, and you have to know that, because if they meet somebody else that will further their agenda, they will leave you and hook up with them, because they were never for you, they were just for what you were for; they are your constituents. And throughout your life, if you’re not careful, particularly if you’re broken, you will mistake your constituents for your confidants. And you will think that they are for you when they are really not for you; they are just for what you are for. And by the time you get to falling in love with them, they will break your heart as they hook up with somebody else who is for what you are for because it was never about you anyway. It was about the causes that you represent. They are for what you are for but they are not for you. They are your constituents.

Comrades – These people are not for you, nor are they for what you are for. It is just that they are against what you are against. And the comrades will make strange bedfellows. This will cause people to come together who are not for you and they are not for what you are for, but they are against what you are against. And they will team up with you to help fight a greater enemy. But don’t be confused by their associations. They will only be with you until the victory is accomplished. These people are like scaffolding. They come into your life to fulfill a purpose and when the purpose is complete the scaffolding is removed. But don’t be upset when they are removed, because the building always remains when the scaffolding is removed.

I can tell you how to identify people who are really for you. If they are really for you, they will weep with you when you weep and they will rejoice when you rejoice. When you walk in a room and you tell somebody good news, stop being happy for a minute and watch their reaction. If they’re not happy for you, shut your mouth and walk back out of the door, because when they are really connected to you, they will be happy for you when you share your dream. Find somebody, look in the eye, and say are you happy for me? If you don’t get the right reaction, don’t tell them anything else.

Don’t worry about the people he took. Clap your hands and be thankful for the people he sent.

Published by Dana

Creative writer about my life and life lessons. Survivor of abandonment, addiction, narcissist relationships, and trauma. Still dealing while I'm healing. Thank you Jesus!

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