For decades I knew I had a magnet on me for addicts. I can go down the list workaholic, pothead, alcoholic, drug addict, sex addict, narcissist. I thought I was a “fixer”. As an empath and helper, I just knew I could help them get better. Nope! Wrong! Stop! Don’t even waste your time. You cannot get anybody better. They must want to get better. Period!
As I told a friend the other day. I’m not here to “fix” anybody with my stories. I’m here to turn the light on. If my story resonates with someone and the light comes on then they control the dimmer switch. It’s up to them how bright they want it to be. Digging up old wounds is just downright painful. It’s hard to heal from our stuff. Emotional healing takes longer and is more painful than physical. If you break your leg and are in a cast, people are nice to you. They will open doors, assist you with your crutches, strangers will ask if you need assistance. Not so much the same when you are trying to heal from trauma and emotional pain. Because we don’t wear a t-shirt and hat naming our stuff. Nobody knows the hell you’re going through or went through.
It’s up to each individual to choose to get better. As I was told in therapy “nobody is coming to save you.” Each one of us controls our dimmer switch. I’ve had mine on since 2009. Yes! I’ve been in crazy school aka therapy with my shrink, (the fun word) since 2009. I’ve turned it up bright at times when I got sick and tired of a situation. I’ve healed from a lot but I still have a long road ahead.
You can learn to fly again. You may crawl, walk and run first but you can do it. You have the power to gather information, to apply it, to open your eyes for signs, and follow your intuition. Meditate and pray for strength, peace, and guidance. And never give up! They’re all just speed bumps, not roadblocks. You’re okay and you’re going to be okay. Love yourself! ❤️